Calling all online fashion shoppers…HELP!

I want to look like me ten years ago but perhaps with more tummy coverage and less cleavage on show. But I also have to be comfortable and be able to do the splits, unintentionally, at a moment’s notice in whatever I am wearing.


IMG_2206I sometimes long for the solitude. Of course I do. The hours spent wafting around shopping centres, browsing, snacking, mooching, daydreaming, watching. The hours in bed, languishing, turning, reading, sleeping.

People go on and on about the sheer amount (*all*) of personal time that small children steal from you, and it does seem to be the one thing that nothing can prepare you for. It’s probably the only truly “hard” thing about it, to me anyway.

Admittedly, it is a big thing because it encompasses both actual time and mental space – there is simply not enough room in my head for all the cogs to keep turning. Something has to give. And in these early years, for me, one of those things has been personal appearance. I’m just terrible at shopping and having two similarly adverse small humans bouncing about my person doesn’t help.

In the good old days, I often looked down at myself at around midday and thought: “What the hell am I wearing?” This was normally due to getting dressed with half a bottle of wine still coursing through my veins after a work “do” or similar. Nowadays, I’m mostly hidden behind a buggy when I trundle off out into public, but the few times I’ve strode out alone, I’ve had to do a double take in a shop window and am often left aghast at what I see.

So my new year resolutions this year will be to go to bed earlier (not to languish, those days are gone, but to have a good, long, hard sleep) and to shop online. Not for bananas and bagels – I already do that VERY successfully thank you. But for clothes and shoes. I am going to bookmark websites. Learn how the sizing will work out for me. Order stuff. Wait expectantly. Try it on. Send it back. I’m going to shop online like it’s 1999.

For God’s sake, in the couple of years I spent working for Revolution magazine, I interviewed the founders of eBay, Moonpig, Easyjet, Expedia, all that lot…I know this shit. Anyone remember one of the first and most epically failing fashion e-tailer Who does? I DO! Trinny and Susannah, before the work, when they launched, which ran out of funding not long after it started. Me, I was there, at the start.

But it’s been a long time since I’ve been a customer of these sites and now I need to take action. But where do I go? I don’t particularly like mumsy or floral or frou-frou. I want to look like me ten years ago but perhaps with more tummy coverage and less cleavage on show (although BUB.2 loves that look on me). But with two little imps to chase after, I also have to be comfortable, and be able to do the splits, unintentionally, at a moment’s notice in whatever I am wearing.

I would love to hear suggestions of websites that fulfil this criteria. Forgive my ignorance, but like I say, these cogs are a little rusty and I could use some advice from anyone who manages to dress themselves properly of a morning.

4 thoughts on “Calling all online fashion shoppers…HELP!

  1. Ah, thank you. I too never fail to come back from town with something cute and sharp for my little ‘uns, trailing wisps of shredded denim and discarded buttons in my wake. Ho hum. I read somewhere once they are four years old life returns pretty much to normal. I’m focusing on that even though I know in my heart it is a downright lie. That all said, life right now is pretty good, scruffy, but good.


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