Things I accept I will never do again

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We all complain about not being able to do stuff we used to, but I find it helps to think of the things I accept I will never do again. Here are just five. There are about five million more.

  1. I’ll never call my ex boyfriend while drunk pretending I am locked out of my house only for him to tell me that caller i.d. tells him I am calling him from inside my house on the landline.
  2. I’ll never wake up in the morning, throw back the covers and step directly into a discarded fish finger sandwich.
  3. I’ll never wonder what I’ll be doing on a Sunday afternoon.
  4. I’ll never give more than a second thought to my toenails. They will clearly forever worry about themselves.
  5. I’ll never take a shower alone without at least eight pairs of googly eyes staring back up at me.

What do you accept that you will never do again?

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