Down but not out

People used to say “When do you want to put the baby down?” or “What time does the baby usually go down?” or ” Does he go down easily?”. Down where I thought? Where is he going?

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When the BUBs were very small there was a phrase that made me uncomfortable, largely because I didn’t know what it meant.

People used to say “When do you want to put the baby down?” or “What time does the baby usually go down?” or ” Does he go down easily?”. Down where I thought? Where is he going?

My mother’s generation, it seems, were taught to put the baby down and walk away and the baby would sleep alone for a period of time before waking.  Lots of parents still do this, with great success. But as my friend Clio FitzHerbert wrote on her splendid blog the other day: “Somewhere along the line we just forgot to put him down. And now he cries every time we do.”

Oops, us too. I may get accusations of spoiling, or creating a monster, or of not letting my child get a proper sleep as he slumps against me for hours on end, but without me he slept for 20, maybe 40 minutes when he was small, and only a few hours now. So I could have taught him that it is only appropriate for him to sleep without me, that I wouldn’t come if he cried or that his cot is a much cosier place than in my arms.

But that would be a lie wouldn’t it?

5 thoughts on “Down but not out

  1. A big fat whopper of a lie yes! For what it’s worth, I forgot to put my babies down too and I don’t believe for one minute that it spoils them. I do believe that it makes for very contented babies that grow into very secure and independent little people though 🙂

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    1. I know. I think it takes a while to realise that the only people it’s a problem for is the ones complaining. The ones cuddling their babies with a big soppy grin on their faces don’t care thank you!!

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  2. Thank you for this post. As a new mummy who’s pretty clueless, I feel heaps better to get understanding from more experienced mums. As I type (one-handed with great difficulty), my wee one is sleeping soundly on my shoulder. Okay my biceps are feeling the strain a bit, but it’s heaven. The cot can wait for another day.

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