If I am ever asked what I would like for Mother’s Day, for the rest of my life I will answer: “What I got in 2010.”
We were traveling as a threesome to Blueys Beach, three hours north of Sydney, for the weekend and we’d booked one hour kayaking each on Smiths Lake. I hadn’t been in a kayak for years but as I rowed off towards the giant sand bank in the distance, I didn’t look back.
Eight months after having my son, the silence was deafening, even drowning out the shouts from the shore of the lake as Willy Wonka and BUB.1 walked as far as they could in my direction before I became a speck. I was gone for the hour, only rowing back when I had to.
Later, Willy Wonka said he couldn’t believe how far I had gone, it had tired him out going half as far. Giving birth gives you new strength, strength enough to find some peace when it’s handed to you. After months of being the whole world to somebody, it felt good to be a speck on the horizon for just an hour.